Should You Consider a Physicians Order for Life Sustaining Treatment (POLST) for Your Aging Parent?

Helping Your Aging Parent

As I waited in the reception area while my mother was with the doctor, I saw a brightly colored paper in a prominant place.  I had taken Mom to many of her appointments after I learned to get her situated in the accessible van that my father had purchased.  I remember looking at the paper, thinking…one more form to get signed.  This document (POLST)  required her doctor’s signature.  There was also a plastic vial.  Roll the form neatly and store it in the refrigerator, the directions said.  It turns out that many assisted living facilities ask their residents to fill out end-of-life forms and store them in the refrigerator in a vial or on the door.  Smart.  Everyone knows were they are, even in an emergency.

How do you start the end-of-life conversation with your parent?

This particular document was easy for me, because-there it was-right in the doctor’s office.  We took two of them, filled them out, put them in the refrigerator and forgot them.  I vividly remember the day that form became a paradox: a life-saver for both my mother and my father.  My mother had had a stroke.  We were talking with the hospitalist and my father was facing the most difficult decision of his life.  With the support of my brother and I, he chose to honor my mother’s wishes that she would never have a feeding tube.  He then asked me to drive home and get the form.  The doctor did not ask for the form.  But at that moment, this was the most important document my father would ever have in his possession.  It was living, tangible proof that he was granting this last wish for his love of 65 years.  I drove home to get it.

Where Can You Obtain a POLST?

You can start by visiting the Center For Ethics and Healtcare  website.  States and forms vary concerning this document, so take the time to educate yourself.